On Being 30 (ok 35)

I am no longer a “spring chicken.” More importantly, I don’t really mind. This is monumental since on the eve of my 30^th birthday, five years ago, I, for lack of a better term, “freaked the (f-expletive) out.” I hadn’t accomplished “enough”; I didn’t have “sufficient” children; I didn’t earn “enough” money; I wasn’t the “right” dress size; I hadn’t published “that” book and my house wasn’t the “perfect” dream home. In summary, I just wasn’t where my 20 year-old-self had envisaged my 30 year-old-self being.

Kids and Poo (As In Poop, Not The Bear)

Kids and Poo (As In Poop, Not The Bear)

Lots of things in my life have changed since having had children. Adjustments have been made.

For example, I bought my first pack of baby wipes in July 2009. I was 27. How on earth did I survive 27 years without baby wipes!?! Aside from being useful to clean butts, sticky fingers and disinfecting children in general, I sort of now use baby wipes for everything. AND. I. MEAN. EVERYTHING. ---- My kitchen hob looks shiny you say? Huggies Natural! My bathroom floor tiles are clean. Huggies Natural! It was nearing the end of the day and my underarms were a bit stinky before the school run. Oh yes. Huggies Natural. I’m just saying.

Yes. I’m Still Nursing My 17 Month Old.

“You are still breastfeeding?”

It’s probably one of the most common questions I get when my son, who is now 17 months old, toddles over, raises his arms and then leans into the ‘breastfeeding position’ as I lift him.

“Yes. Yes, I am.”

“He’s eating food right?”

“Yes. He eats all his meals but still feeds on demand.”

The truth is, he is my third child. I breastfed my two daughters before him, so when he came, I was sure that breastfeeding was going to be easy. It didn’t turn out that way. He was hungry and aggressive and had a latch so painful that my nipples were constantly bleeding and the pain was so strong that I threw a cup of tea across the room in anger once. I persevered through 6 weeks of pain and there were many tears. Then one day, like magic, we had a rhythm and since then it has been smooth sailing.

It comforts him. It soothes him. He sleeps well. He sleeps very well. I am in a position where I am able to feed him on demand. His sisters who are 4 and 5 are comfortable around ‘boobs’ and feeding. They often tell me, ‘the baby wants a feed.” They hang out with us while I nurse him, sometimes arguing over who gets to sit next to his head. Once he is drowsy, I place him in his cot and spend the rest of the night bonding with my girls.

I am still nursing. He is not ready to stop. I am not ready to stop. One day it will end. That will be it. Until then, I will gaze into my little man’s eyes.

pokorn and karits

My 4.5 year-old wrote me a note and told me not to open it until she was in bed. I just did. It says

‘Pleez bi pokorn and karits.’ (transation – please buy popcorn and carrots.) 

Work or Stay @ Home

Lisa Heffernan from GrownandFlown, wrote about her regrets leaving a high powered job to raise her children (link here).

Food for thought. That's all. It's bedtime for me.

Rantings About Career

I am still in career limbo – trying to keep one toe in the water whilst pondering whether to sod it all, stay at home, go back full-time or retrain and start working again once the kids are all in school.  I see women with plans and even more upsetting, women who are putting their plans into action, meeting goals and always one step closer to their goals. Ah well. Nevermind. What’s a mom to do? Sometimes I feel like moving to some obscure, cheap and beautiful part of the world where we can all live on next to nothing. I’d home school and we’d all be happy right?

Why I Hate British Airways and Why My 5 Month Old Has An Email Address

I know that it is not obvious from the title, but this is a gripe about a society that is becoming far too techy and the company culture that forces technology down our throats.

I just spent over 3,600 GBP (that’s over $6000) on flights with British Airways. And by ‘just spent’ I mean just today, a few hours ago. And I’m angry.  I think that’s a heap of money. So when I saw that my children’s flights weren’t linked to my frequent flyer number, I thought that I’d give them a ring and add my three children to my account. My thinking was that sometime in the future, I’d earn a free flight or upgrade, especially given that the children and I make this trip EVERY year.

The first problem I encountered was, I couldn’t find an appropriate number to ring. After really digging through the website, I came across one. I rang the number, a recording told me that they were very busy and tried to convince me to visit “my booking” on ba.com. I persevered through a very confusing (and unfriendly) options menu and finally spoke to a real live person, in a different country of course. Victorious I was 17 minutes later.

Why I Suck as a Mom: It All Started with a Buzzing Toothbrush

My eldest child is 4-and- a-half. Let’s call her Api (because that’s her name). She has been refusing to eat my home cooked meals. Annoying? Yes. Very. Very annoying.

About 10 days ago, she stopped using the electric ‘buzzing’ toothbrush that she had begged for and I went out of my way to find. I was irritated but passive aggressively let it go – the whole, 'not worth an argument ' argument. Fine.